Holiday Changes

When my daughters were little I loved Thanksgiving.  For once I didn’t mind getting up by seven.  I’d sneak down to the kitchen to chop up the onions, mushrooms and celery for the stuffing, still my favorite part of the feast, humming as I worked.  Sneaking fooled no one; soon the girls were running around the kitchen, watching TV, which I allowed on that morning, and climbing up on a kitchen chair to see what I was doing.  Now my grandson climbs up to see what his mother or I are making when we cook together, which warms my heart.  It represents a circle of family and love for me, one of the most important aspects of my life as I age.  This year my younger daughter and her family are going to Chicago to visit her husband’s family for the holiday, but my older daughter and her husband are driving the eight hours from Bend, Oregon, where they live, to share the holiday with us.  Because it’s such a long drive it’s rare for them to visit here, or for us to drive all the way there.  We have  video chat and Skype, and that helps.   My daughter and I both seem to be excited about spending this holiday together.  Since she is gluten free – she has Lyme’s disease, and cutting out wheat has helped her symptoms – I asked if she would make a pie. Everyone knows about my chocolate pecan masterpiece and usually begins talking about it weeks before the holiday, so giving the job away was not easy, silly as that may sound.  My daughter seemed delighted to take on the task, later calling back to find out what pie was my partner, Wonono’s favorite and what was mine. Turns out the two men love banana cream, and we like lemon meringue. She is bringing both!  Farewell chocolate pecan, which had become too rich for me anyway.  She also told me she has found a terrific vegie dish and would make that.  If I use real yams, rather than canned, which my mom did, she would love it if I’d make my sweet potato casserole.   I  am so health food conscious it’s funny that I used canned; tradition, I suppose.  I’ve already bought the yams. We have talked about salad – yay or nay – wine, coffee/tea, other meals and various aspects of our long weekend, which doesn’t seem long at all to me, and have both really gotten into the planning of the days, especially the food part!  I did the same with my friend Elaine when we took our kids camping.  We ate like Queens, Queens who served ourselves and our kids.  At first it felt odd to me that I was not doing the lion’s share of the cooking this Thanksgiving, and that my home wouldn’t be filled with my kids, their mates, their kids, and various friends who didn’t have family close by, but within days, because of my daughter’s enthusiasm, I started to relish the time the four of us would have together.  The time when I was ‘mom’ for us all is shifting, as are other aspects of my life, but this one is a welcome shift.  Perhaps the weekend will help me accept some of the less joyful ones, as well as the aches and pains of getting older.